I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize
