I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
Randomize
