no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Randomize
