I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize