Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
this is an emotional support booty call
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
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