thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Randomize
