your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Don't make out with my wife yet
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Randomize
