he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
