well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
