But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Randomize
