i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
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