Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
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