I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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