I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
