I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
Randomize
