i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
Randomize
