I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
