thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize