dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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