You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize