i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Randomize
