why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
