i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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