She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
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