she was so not down for the gang bang
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
