Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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