A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Randomize
