no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Randomize