well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Randomize
