Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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