I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
