I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
