what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
