we're blogging at a bar
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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