I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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