My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
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