3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize
