I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'
I thought that was really considerate
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
