Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
no you cant smoke seaweed
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize