I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
