What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
