Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize
