the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize