whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
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