Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Randomize
