South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
