D3 body, D1 cock
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
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