im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Randomize