I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
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