Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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